Advertising / Feminism / Sex

Dating for Misogynists: Carrot Dating App Finds Least Desirable Men Ever

Wade dangles carrots (in an obvious metaphor) in front of 3 possibly would-be prostitutes, who do not see him, but only the carrots.If a straight man can’t approach women through traditional means (you know, by talking to them), then perhaps it’s time to go way, way back, to the time of dowries and shit, and make some kind of “arrangement,” if you know what I mean. The Carrot Dating app created by MIT alum and world’s most desirable man, Bandon Wade, might just be for you. Above you can see a picture of him dangling some carrot in front of a trio of women in teddies as they discuss whether they want to date him, and the merits of his gift.

On the other hand, Carrot Dating has faced some backlash from others who call it sexist and borderline prostitution, especially in Wade’s comparison of women to dogs when he mentioned that “women love presents like dogs love treats.” When pressed further on this matter, the Carrot Dating site sent out a press release to defend his position in an attempt to explain that actually it’s not sexist. It’s just our animalistic instinct.

“There’s only one method of manipulation that has stood the test of time: bribery. It’s a concept so simple that even animals understand — give a dog a bone, and it will obey. Give a woman a present, and she’ll…”

Don’t sweat it guys. This dude went to MIT, so the algorithms for this dating app must be SOLID. It also must mean his unfounded pseudo-science when applied to this app is unarguably correct, not to mention his blanket statements about what women want, and whether they are simple and shallow as portrayed in the picture above. Wade went on to insist, “I adore women,” at the suggestion of his sexism. As soon as I read those words, I let out the biggest LOLSOB I’ll ever hear and wondered vaguely inf BYSU needed a sexism 101 post just in case there were more people like this. I love popcorn. But I’m still gonna get my greasy hands all over it and chew it, and pick it out of my teeth, and drop it all over the floor at the movies. Here is someone who is blithely unaware of the implications of anything he says and does. Instead he’s probably wondering, “What’s the big DEAL! I just want women to have more gifts! Now I’m the bad guy…”

Also because Wade doesn’t seem to get tired of the stupid carrot motif, or of telling everyone he went to MIT (by wearing yet another t-shirt), here’s a bonus picture:

Wade once again dangling carrots in front of sexy women and wearing yet another MIT shirt because his wardrobe is probably entirely MIT shirts.Take note: He’s doing the evil pinky thing! HE’S DOING THE EVIL PINKY THING!!! This guy may not be a clueless misogynist after all, but literally just a self aware and evil man.

Here’s what Wade does understand. A carrot is not just a carrot. Gifts have meaning. And Wade, also the founder of the much more honest sugardaddy dating site, Seeking Arrangement, understands what those meanings are. Wade claims the mobile app’s “unique approach teaches singles to always bring something to the table.” In that case, that “something” for men is money and that “something” for women is physical desirability and maybe some sexy times afterward (wink). The tradition of dating where dudes pay for everything and create some kind of extravagant show to win over a woman is based not only on a patriarchal tradition of women not being breadwinners, but it also comes from the same tradition of men showing they’re good providers while women show they’re good in the sack.

Even without the explicit words, “carrot dating,” there is still this implication. And it actually leads to women I know, myself included, who feel weird about accepting grand gestures and expensive gifts, or going on dates where the guy does the paying. I’ve heard a friend confide that she felt weird going on a pricey first date and not sleeping with the date in question, even after all the effort he put in. And I even feel uncomfortable standing up for myself and saying “no,” when I actually don’t owe anyone anything. It makes me feel like I’m not pulling my weight. Like I’m not bringing something to the table. Dating services like Carrot Dating or Seeking Arrangement hedge their bets on a sense of entitlement for men, where a great gift will get you a great date with a great woman. They also hedge their bets on a sense of obligation for women, whereby accepting a gift is accepting all the expectations that come with it. You can wrap it up in romance, but the implication is still the same.

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